Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize
