I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
