I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?