yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Please don't give away my fajitas
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
