thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
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