Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
