he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
