hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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