Me. At least after what I've been through.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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