I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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