You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
