Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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