Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
