But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
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You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
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That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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