I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
