I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize