And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
