I look better un-naked...
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize