i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
