i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Randomize