someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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