do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
