just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
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the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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