He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
