He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
