I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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