Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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