i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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