I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
