He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
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"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
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Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.