After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
there is glitter all over my balls
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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