I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Hello my rib-scented angel!
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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