It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
