we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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