but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize