I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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