I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
She's the barista slut.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
