how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
