im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize