My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
You pole danced in your parka.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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