R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
