This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
