so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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