no, he came in my armpit
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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