you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize