Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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