Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
