I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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