you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
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