i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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