xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize