I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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